Wedding Night Rules –Doing “It” For the First Time? Let’s have “the talk”!

Neha Garg, 30 Jul 2015

Virgins of the world – unite! Unless the wedding night rule in your clan states that you and your partner aren’t supposed to “sleep” together (what? Some have that, okay?), the night can turn out to be pretty awkward for the both of you. Now, there are too many scenarios to take into account today. For starters, is yours going to be an arranged marriage or a love marriage? Apologies if we sound like we’re prying, but have you guys done it before? Is there a particular set of rules that need to be followed on your first night together as a married couple? The excitement of the wedding night can turn pretty sour if you both aren’t sure of what the other one likes. Vivah

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For the sake of this article, we shall assume that you and your partner are the real-life replica of Shahid Kapoor and Amrita Rao in the movie Vivah. Picture, if you will, you two are pretty comfortable with each other by now, but when it comes to taking the relationship to the next level, you’d rather wait till you tie the knot. Well, good for you, as long as you’ve done your research on the thing beforehand, for let’s be honest, the climax of Vivah didn’t really clarify a lot many of our queries.

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Wedding Night Etiquette #1: Go Slow


Image Source Let’s establish one thing. Past experience will only help you with the “technique”, and nothing else. When it comes to your wedding night, you have a lot to unlearn. This, is almost impossible if you two have been waiting forever. But, you see, this night will, in a way, create a first impression on your partner, and the expectations are obviously nothing less than mind-blowing. So, keep that animal instinct for later, okay? Our suggestion: Take it slow, talk to your partner, figure out what they would like you to do or not do, and then proceed. This, is how you score a 10 on 10. While we don’t recommend you get talking about the most intimate details, it’s better to roughly chart the course of the rest of the evening, rather than proceeding while absolutely clueless of what the other one wants.

Wedding Night Etiquette #2: Play before the foreplay


Image Source Yes, you may have been waiting for this moment your entire life, but you know what’ll make the experience all the more special? Setting the mood, and delaying it just a few moments further. How, you may ask? Well, don’t just jump right into bed. A casual, relaxing warm bath after the hectic wedding rituals, light music, candles, and sharing a snack can ease the tension between you two. What’s more, this gives you a chance to discuss with your partner what they’re looking forward to in terms of the “deed”. Once you’re all calm and comfortable, you guys can go ahead and take the night in whatever direction you may wish to.

Wedding Night Etiquette #3: Pamper your way to a sensual escapade


Image Source So what if the wedding ceremony was exhausting? You wouldn’t get this night ever again in your life. Make the most of it by cuddling your partner with a quick foot rub or whispering sweet nothings into their ear. None of these activities command extreme physical indulgence, and thus, you not only ease the pressure, but also turn them on in a certain way. Whatever activity you choose, make sure you add a sensual angle to it. Nothing sets the tone for the evening like an erotic back massage, or stealing tiny moments of flaunting your body to leave them craving for more.

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Wedding Night Etiquette #4: Condoms – Yes or No?


Image Source Unless you’re okay with an unplanned pregnancy right away, condoms are a no-brainer! What’s more, “safe time of the month” is a myth. Hence, it’s better to avoid any complications later on, and go for protection without thinking twice. One of the most significant things here is to choose the right one though. The right choice will ensure a steamy, more pleasurable session by enhancing stimulation. If you have absolutely no idea about the types of condoms, here’s a quick tip: go for either dotted, ribbed, or studded latex. They work wonders on the pleasure front, leaving the lady with a wicked sensation of “fullness”. The best condoms, however, are flavored condoms which, according to most women, are at the forefront of the act of pleasing and being pleased, simultaneously.


Image Source We often get queries from would-be brides if men even want to wear a condom on the first night of their wedding or not. We think, most of them do! But, it’s better to talk to your man first, learn about his preferences, and then move forward. While condoms are only 97% effective, we often recommend that the lady be on some sort of contraceptive, and be completely strict about it.

Wedding Night Etiquette #5: Communicate ‘during’ the act

Perhaps, the most important part of sex is to communicate during the session. Now, by communicating, we don’t mean you start chit-chatting and veer away from the actual thing. Keep asking your partner if “they’re liking it”, “if it feels good” or, in case you’re feeling a little impulsive, “do you think it’s okay if I try…”.The reason for this mini-Q&A is to show how much you care for your partner’s pleasure, and to ease the entire process as a whole. 7

Image Source For first timers, however, something as far-fetched as “dirty talk” may be a bit too awkward to pull off. In that case, keep responding timidly to your partner’s moves as a sign of acceptance and derivation of pleasure. And, with time, you’ll get better at the communication, and be much more comfortable with your partner.


Image Source Listen, as much as you may want your wedding night to be the epitome of perfection, it may not always turn out to be that way. The good news, however, is that you get to progress in your craft with time and practice. The pressure of the first night of the wedding has taken many a couple by stride. But, you see, your wedding night isn’t all about the “deed”. Instead, talk about your hopes and dreams while fondling with your partner, or let them know how lucky you are to have married them while stealing a kiss or two. All in all, just aim to make the other feel good and satisfied.

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